If something bad happens in your life, how do you explain it? “Such is life...” “Dang it, why was I such an idiot....” “Dang it, why was that person such an idiot...” or the good ole stand by of shaking your fist in the air? What really chaps my hide, or really bugs me, is when someone says "It’s a blessing in disguise." Really? A blessing? No, I don't think so. Something bad happening is never a blessing. Ever.
And now on to my soap box:
Things happen in life. Bad things happen to good people. Good people do bad things. Life just sometimes happens. But why do some people call the bad times a blessing? um, so you're saying that I should thank someone or some higher power for tragedy, strife and/or heartache? No, I’m not buying it. We live in a culture of "dog eat dog" and "survival of the fittest." So when something bad happens, you don’t just go stagnate and say thanks, you adjust your life accordingly and venture down a new path. We all hope that the new path will bring us luck and happiness, and often times it does, but that is no reason to count your pits as blessings. I don’t think I will ever look back on my hard times and say "gee I am so glad I went through that because it got me this and that." No, I had to pick myself up, deal with emotions that I never wanted to deal with, and then begin to look for a better tomorrow down other avenues. Who is to say that if tragedy didn’t strike that I wouldn’t be where I am now or know the people I know today. If there really is a master plan and we are all just walking down a predetermined path, then really, nothing is a blessing, it is just life.
I had a job in LA that I hated. I had been there for 2.5 years and couldn't stand to work there another day. But I bit the bullet and dealt with the bureaucracy and the bs but I was also looking for another job. They called me in on a Thursday and "let me go." I already had 3 interviews lined up for the next day and had planned on taking the day off to go to them but I refuse to think of that example as a blessing in disguise because I would have never left that job without having one lined up. Plus I didn't get any of those jobs and I am still recovering; I had to adjust my life accordingly and make the best out of a bad situation. What I do count as blessings are my amazing family who took me in with open arms, support and unconditional love; my good friends who stood by me and provided an ear and a shoulder; and that I am healthy and happy.
Maybe it is just an everyday cliche that people say to make the hard times seem better, I mean there are so many ("what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger" is another doozy) and it is so easy to get caught in a self-indulged pity party. And maybe we do need some kind of rationale that will help bring us out of the doom and gloom and into the light for the sake of our sanity. I have no idea. All I know is that things in life have happened. Some good, some bad, some I caused, some other people had a hand in. I am not going to thank my lucky stars for the tears, the red in my bank account, and the pain. I’ve seen things and felt things that I hope I never experience again and I absolutely do not look back on any of the bad stuff as blessings.
(For background and to see what I have done so far on the 30 Little Things project click here. Also follow Home Sweet Sarah's 30 Things, since I got the idea from her)